CAT scan, anyone?

Something I did during my free time in the clinic. Took me approximately 10 hours to complete.

PC Requirement:

Hardware -

Lots of memory ram. Minimum is 128 megs but from experience that is downright slow.
I upgraded my notebook to 256 megs a few years ago, and I think I'm doing OK but still slow (which explains the amount of time it took me to finish one piece of work). Many PCs nowadays offer at least 512 MB which should be just comfortable.

Also, don't run any other program as it will bog you down. Monitor resolution should preferably be higher than the usual 800 x 600. A good graphic card is esential.

You also need Wacom tablet and pen. I bought it for RM250 about 5 years ago and it has never given me any problem. I've test run it in a pilot project for medical record a few years back. I noticed a 'wow' reaction from some of my patients. Unfortunately, I have abandoned the project as I feel in the long run, it would just eat up too much space and processor power.

Software -

Corel Painter 6 (thankfully this registered version comes bundled with the Wacom purchase). Technology is advancing so fast that I think right now they have come up with version 10!

Some thoughts on digital art:

Digital art is the most forgiving form of art I've worked with as I can undo my work up to 10 strokes backwards, in case I mess things up. Of course I try not to do it often as I may develop a liking for it. I certainly can't do that in traditional painting! The closest resemblance of digital art to a traditional media is oil painting as one can blend colors continuously to one's heart's content, unlike an unforgiving media like watercolor and acrylic.

Corel Painter has literally hundreds of brushes and short cut functions to allow the user to work smoothly. One can rotate, transform, liquify and change the entire contour of the painting. There are many 'magic wand' special efects that one can play with. You need to be selective, though, and familiarize with your favourite brushes, palette, canvas texture etc, otherwise you could get way overboard with this fantastic painting software. For example, if I want to smear 2 colors together, I would just slide the resaturation scale to 0% and the bleed scale all the way to 100%.

Is digital art good for the soul? The answer is in the affirmative, depending on what you draw and paint. It is a very healing process for me. More than just peace of mind, it has drawn me closer to God. So go ahead and try it. You may get hooked on it.

Lastly, for all those already dabbling with digital art, happy painting!

Reminiscing Valentine's Day?

Love blossoms. I wonder how the young couples are sharing their Valentine. If this is your first time, don't forget about the ambience though, whether at home or in a restaurant.

Gift sharing is another important tradition. It could be flowers, cards, gadgets, watches, a lavish dinner, or even a night's stay in a hotel, whatever your budget allows. Die-hards will insist on three stalks of roses. I like Shakespeare's take on this:

What's in a name? That which we call a rose
By any other word would smell as sweet.

-From Romeo and Juliet (ll, ii, 1-2)

However of all the gifts, there's one you shouldn't even consider:


Even though the new Chinese Lunar New Year is just around the corner:

"Happy New Year", cried the pigs as they are herded to the slaughter house.

I discovered a very interesting idea in using milk and coffee powder to make a sort of latte art. Perhaps, the guys can bring their GFs to Starbucks or Dome, in case all other restaurants are packed tonight. Just hope the coffee won't chill out before the art is done.


As for me, I have my family life to live. Our schedule is too hectic - it's like running on a non-stop treadmill. However, we do celebrate Valentine's Day - every day. Love comes in small, small packets too!

Lastly, don't forget to say the words. It would be like rays of sunlight shining into the heart of your sweetheart, something like this:

My dream ecopark

I was standing at a foot of a tree in the twilight, listening to the sounds of nature. Suddenly, as I was turning to go back, I began to hear soft murmurs all around me which became more and more distinct. Initially I thought it was the sound of a small stream or the rustling of leaves over my head. I looked at a clearing in the forest but saw nothing. At length, the sound grew more intelligible. It was the sound of small creatures that were hiding in the dark places in the forest. Soon the trees joined in and they were holding a sort of mass communication with me. The sound slowly turned into clear words, echoed several times: Save us! Death is all around us!



This is a painting of my dream ecopark. As it is, it shall remain a dream. Life holds many uncertainties. However, as far as environment is concerned, there is one certainty - the world is getting warmer. The ice bordering the Artic is breaking up. The flood has paralysed a whole neighbouring city. In certain parts of Johor, the people are still standing on soggy land. The drought is coming. Are we on the eve of some major ecological upheaval?

The illegal logging and land clearing should now be classified as major social sins. More funds and effort should be poured into nature conservation. Each of us have also sinned a little by contributing to the greenhouse effect. This earth is the only one of its kind that we have at the moment. Please take good care of it.

Always Winter, Never Christmas

I've taken a leaf from Marina Mahathir's blog on social entrepreneurs. Who are they and why are they flocking to the recent World Economic Forum at Davos, Switzerland? Florence Nightingale was a well known social entrepreneur who founded a nursing school. Another is Muhammad Yunus, a Bangladeshi and last year's Nobel Prize Winner, dubbed a 'world banker for the poor'. His banking system extended microcredit to the poor, especially women, so that they and their families can break free from poverty.

Social entrepreneurs are people who have dedicated their lives to work for the eradication of poverty or at least an alleviation from the present state, the promotion of health and education, the betterment of women and children, the freedom of the press, the conservation of the environment and many, many more issues.

These are people who are not only innovative but single minded in their approach, so much so that they are willing to do away with whatever idealistic thoughts or even material comforts they may have for the sake of humanitarian causes.

These are people who want to share the fruits of their success with the society in which they were bought up and which they now feel obliged to serve

People with charitable hearts. People with the vision to see through projects and to find solutions to the social injustice that has afflicted the local community

They come from various backgrounds eg businessmen, economists, scientists, accountants and even fresh graduates. Their work is akin to that of full time philantropists but who uses their creativity and entrepreneurship to solve social problems. They have become a class of celebrity of a different kind at Davos. As a journalist, Nicholas Kristof observed: It’s one of the most hopeful and helpful trends around. These folks aren’t famous, and they didn’t fly to Davos in first-class cabins or private jets, but they are showing that what it really takes to change the world isn’t so much wealth or power as creativity, determination and passion.

You too can be a social entrepreneur if your heart desires it to be.

You know, I wish I could help emerging artists who are struggling with their livelihood. They are indeed talented but they do not have the material means to produce artwork that are consistent with their artistic genius. One of the ways out for them to promote their art is to display their work online for the whole world to view, as in an online gallery. Perhaps a like-minded person with better connections with local artists or art associations can do the job better. Perhaps the registration fee can be waived and they are free to post a limited amount of paintings with their biodata attached.

The organiser or webmaster can then help to oversee the transaction between the buyer and artist at a minimal cost. In fact, I would propose that the website be opened to artists from anywhere in the world for that added flavour and variety. We learn not only from our masters, but from each other so that we can better ourselves. We cater to different needs. A certain segment of the society may be collecters of floral paintings. An American art enthusiast may want scenes depicting the recent Thaipusam event at Batu Caves. A foreign bank may want to commission a series of work on the kampungs and fishing villages. Needless to say, the world is getting flatter and we have ample opportunities to make our presence felt in the international art terrain. The local artists need to be unified and not be like scattered individuals with hidden talents. A little networking can go a long way.

George MacDonald - Phantastes

Many years ago , a young Oxford student named CS Lewis, who was to become the author of forty books including the bestseller, Chronicles of Narnia, reluctantly purchased a novel by George MacDonald called Phantastes, a Faerie Romance at a secondhand bookshop while waiting for a train. A few hours later, he knew he was on his way out as a sound atheist towards a progressive belief in a monotheistic God. Lewis, the literary critic acknowledged his debt to the Scottish novelist, by saying that 'I had never concealed the fact that I regarded him as my master; indeed I fancy I have never written a book in which I did not quote from him" ,"Now Phantastes ... had about it a sort of cool, morning innocence ... What it actually did to me was to convert, even to baptise ... my imagination."

More than a master, CS Lewis, have been known to look upon George MacDonald, as his heavenly guide. The 19th century Scottish master storyteller can be considered a pioneer in fantasy fiction in his time. His works may have lapsed into obscurity among our present generation of readers but he has been an inspiration to writers like JRR Tolkien, Charles Williams,G.K. Chesterton and Madeleine L’Engle. The mention of fantasy in our modern times may conjure up notions of magic, witchcraft, dungeons and dragons, the good versus evil and so on. However, MacDonald's work of fantasy was of the old nature, where both the good and evil nature is intrinsic in the character of the hero of the story. Many have considered fantasy and myth as worthless stories made up as lies. But lies they are not. According to Tolkien, 'Far from being lies they were the best way, sometimes the only way, of conveying truths that would otherwise remain inexpressible. We have come from God and inevitably the myths woven by us, though they contain error, reflect a splintered fragment of the true light, the eternal truth that is with God'.

When MacDonald wrote Phantastes in 1857, he described it as “a kind of fairy tale, in the hope that it will pay me better than the more evidently serious work.” It was the turning point in the literary career of the visionary novelist. The story is about the adventures of a young man, named Anodos, as he enters into an archetypal fairyland where he encounters evil spirits, horrifying creatures and also beautiful beings. Sometimes it may seem that he is wandering aimlessly in the mysterious land but there are always lessons to be learned, including some profoundly deep spiritual insights and concepts of love. He often falls prey to temptations due to pride. His vulnerability to human love continues to haunt his mind until the book's end. MacDonald stood head and shoulder above other fiction writers because he was able to convey moral teachings through a series of paradoxes - how in order to live, one must die, how treasured things must be given away in order to be found. And he did this through a beautiful, though sometimes twisted storyline filled with pathos. It's something like an 'Alice in Wonderland', written by his family friend, Lewis Caroll, but meant for grownups

The book is heavy with symbolism. This is one of the concepts which I picked up as I read through books by both CS Lewis and MacDonald over the years. By symbolism, a person tries to see something else through the senses, to find a meaning that is more real than is apparent. It is hoped that when others see the responses to natural beauty for example, through literary or artistic means, they would also recognise similar responses of their own. Here is an excerpt from Phantastes to illustrate the point:

Why are all reflections lovelier than what we call the reality?— not so grand or so strong, it may be, but always lovelier? Fair as is the gliding sloop on the shining sea, the wavering, trembling, unresting sail below is fairer still. Yea, the reflecting ocean itself, reflected in the mirror, has a wondrousness about its waters that somewhat vanishes when I turn towards itself...... In whatever way it may be accounted for, of one thing we may be sure, that this feeling is no cheat; for there is no cheating in nature and the simple unsought feelings of the soul. There must be a truth involved in it, though we may but in part lay hold of the meaning. Even the memories of past pain are beautiful; and past delights, though beheld only through clefts in the grey clouds of sorrow, are lovely as Fairy Land..... The moon, which is the lovelier memory or reflex of the down-gone sun, the joyous day seen in the faint mirror of the brooding night, had rapt me away.

The other concept, in which I am a strong advocate, is called romanticism. As Lewis explained, "It is the attempt to reach religious truths by means and techniques traditionally called romantic." It is not anything new, but a presentation of truths in modern terms. The image of the beloved is the image of divine beauty. This interplay between reality and pictured reality is closely interwoven with a certain joy, that is man' longing for eternal home.You find these themes recurring in Phantastes:

I sat long by the fire, meditating, and wondering how it would all end; and when at length, wearied with thinking, I betook myself to my own bed, it was half with a hope that, when I awoke in the morning, I should awake not only in my own room, but in my own castle also; and that I should walk, out upon my own native soil, and find that Fairy Land was, after all, only a vision of the night. The sound of the falling waters of the fountain floated me into oblivion.

The circumstances in which children are born in a certain part of the Fairy-Land are rather peculiar - more like a discovery:

Now the children, there, are not born as the children are born in worlds nearer to the sun. For they arrive no one knows how. A maiden, walking alone, hears a cry: for even there a cry is the first utterance; and searching about, she findeth, under an overhanging rock, or within a clump of bushes, or, it may be, betwixt gray stones on the side of a hill, or in any other sheltered and unexpected spot, a little child. This she taketh tenderly, and beareth home with joy, calling out, “Mother, mother”—if so be that her mother lives—“I have got a baby—I have found a child!” All the household gathers round to see;—“Where is it? What is it like? Where did you find it?” and such-like questions, abounding. And thereupon she relates the whole story of the discovery.....

As the children are nurtured and become grownups, there is another distinct peculiarity:

After they grow up, the men and women are but little together. There is this peculiar difference between them, which likewise distinguishes the women from those of the earth. The men alone have arms; the women have only wings. Resplendent wings are they, wherein they can shroud themselves from head to foot in a panoply of glistering glory.

And, again that longing for eternal home:

The sign or cause of coming death is an indescribable longing for something, they know not what, which seizes them, and drives them into solitude, consuming them within, till the body fails. When a youth and a maiden look too deep into each other’s eyes, this longing seizes and possesses them; but instead of drawing nearer to each other, they wander away, each alone, into solitary places, and die of their desire.

If the book itself (in PDF format) is about travels, then I would consider myself as a fellow traveller along with Anodos. With so many new things to discover in this strange land, wonderfilled experiences came to me as if I was walking, fighting, suffering and even rejoicing like Anodos himself. To the modern reader, this is not an action packed fantasy. book. Instead this is a phantastic book of high phantasy, where you get to read the mind of a mystical writer in his highly imaginative mood.

A Song In The Morning

I love to write reviews about the lives and works of great figures of the past. Why do I keep doing it, even though I do not even qualify myself for this undertaking? I do not want to be seen as standing on my pedestal, judging the works of people who can no longer speak for themselves. Just think of me as clearing an old pathway for your enlightenment. I believe there is a deep need in all of us to make this world a better place. One of the ways to fulfill this objective is to look at the world from the shoulders of giants. All my philosophical musings are nothing new. I am only expounding ideas set forth many aeons ago by great men and women of the past.

I half remember a vision I had not long ago about a visit to a great museum that displayed the lifestory of great artists, poets and philosophers who had lived many generations ago. Lives of people like Michaelangelo, Leonardo da Vinci, George MacDonald, C S Lewis, Plato, Augustine were on display on a big, wide screen. Outside the great hall, at the entrance, were many sculptures representing the works of literary giants. One stood out among them. On the stone was inscribed the word, Phantastes by George MacDonald. I shall do a review of this extraordinary work that had colored the perception of the world around me and, as CS Lewis once said, 'baptised my imagination'.

As expected, heavy downpour has hit us again. Last night, my old clinic shoplot suffered a huge crack on the roof as water dripped down through the gaps like rainshower. We tried to contain the water. The filling of pails and containers sounded like an orchestra of broken music. A second wave of floods, particularly in Johor, has continued to grab the headlines in recent days. While there is mass evacuation, some people are refusing to leave their homes despite the rising water level. Since God's being is closely reflected in nature, how do we make sense of what is happening today? It is as if God has turned His face from us, leaving us to swim in His tears. I looked at the scenes of the flood and I pondered. As I pondered, I began to see a flicker of hope for those who have lost their properties, belongings and treasured items. That hope lies in the lifting up of the feeble head of the little girl as she wades through the subsiding deluge with her mother. That hope lies in the brief smile on the troubled countenance of the pakcik upon seeing children having fun on a boat. That hope lies in the lighting of a candle as whole townships suffer blackouts. Despite the waves of flood that will surely come again, we as a human race shall survive this ordeal.

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I would like to thank the folks at Malaysian Medical Resources for tagging me in one of their grand blogrounds. As you do your 'ward' rounds, I am glad you have not forgotten to look at things in a holistic manner.

Work in progress